Devaccination (-1.0)
14 hours ago
Showing posts with label name. Show all posts
Showing posts with label name. Show all posts
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Required reading
Book title: Lives of the Great Bloggers
via flickr.com
In some far distant time, perhaps, when people want to learn about the hardships and tribulations of the past, they may wish to dip into a book about the great forgotten pioneers of our time. I am not sure that Lives of the Great Tweeps passes the suspension of disbelief test, however.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Restaurant concept for the 21st century
Restaurant name: Bistro QR
via flickr.com
Instead of the the blue and white checkered tablecloths each table would have a QR code which the servers would scan at the time the order is taken. The food could be coded as well to ensure accuracy in delivering the courses as well.
Sunday, January 17, 2010
From the bowels of a secret scent laboratory
Implement of non-that-flashy destruction: Sub-Atomizer
via flickr.com
They call it an atomizer, but does it properly render things into their individual atoms? Molecules maybe, or big clumps of molecules which fall apart much later by gaseous diffusion, but certainly not breaking any bonds that were there before. I want a real atomizer that will spit out free radicals like one one's business. No, better yet, I want a sub-atomizer that will take your basic drugstore scent and scrub it down to elementary particles and spew them out in a murderous stream if I want. Because that would be virile and noble and a little bit dangerous as well. Or in an improved version you could point it at something and it would render it down to its constituent nucleons and electrons, stimulating the protons to decay into horrible little positrons maybe so that it would fall apart into radioactive nothingness right then.
It would be a fearsome gadget to possess, but still an elegant one to look at, with its main chamber perhaps made of some semiprecious stone or cut crystal, and the part which does the puffing off to one side of the nozzle in a way that calls to mind some kind of casualness that the trigger of a gun or the fire button of a launch console clearly does not. To do its thing it would have to have some potent power source around, but that would be hidden so that it would keep its neat simple lines and its finesse as well, probably miniaturizing and condensing the thing so that it could be tucked into a corner of the reservoir or more likely embedded in the spray head somehow. It would be shielded, tamed, of alien provenance most probably, and worth more than battleships or research reactors, provided it could be something you actually could buy.
Who would know of the sub-atomizer, though, unless its devious amoral creator releases some information, not too much, about what it can do? But in publicity, as always, the more effective the buzz about the thing is the more perilous it is to have it around where curious types of low morals might try to liberate it for themselves. It would be more effective to broadcast a demonstration of its potential, showing how thoroughly it renders the armament of the superpowers obsolete all except for the think tanks working feverishly to reconstruct it in their own labs, if even in a perverted form.It does its best work in secret, but does not rely on sleight-of-hand or social hacking the way most pieces of malware on the Internet. It needs no master and very little language to accomplish what's in its nature, though it would be good to place trusted guards on it so that it can be kept from close inspection by the criminal brutes who understand only that it is new and valuable. They are not the kind of people who would want to deal with the non-sold-out mission, little impressed by the graphics that go along with it either.
(504 words)
Tuesday, January 05, 2010
Saturday, January 02, 2010
Crisis averted for now
Name for the last decade: The kooky glasses era
via flickr.com
Makers of novelty eyewear have had to be more inventive than usual this year because of the missing double-aughts in the middle of the year. I predict that next year the available strategems will prove to be too strained to come up with a viable marketable product.
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
The stage show, the film, and the concert tour
via (broken link)
Sequel name: Jesus H. Christ Super-Fricken-Rockstar
The part of Judas 2.0 would be pivotal - he would be a metal android with an autotune voicebox riding in a monster truck.Monday, November 30, 2009
The upside is their sliminess
Scary movie title: The Giant Tentacled Stomachs That Attacked Japan
Preceeded by an educational short on the proper enjoyment of monster ice cream.Wednesday, November 18, 2009
By the numbers
Art movement: Abstract Microrepresentationalism
via flickr.com
You just need a good collection of these micrographs, a slide projector, a large canvas, some charcoal to trace the outlines out with, a few cans of acrylic paint, and some time to fill in the regions according to the original.
Monday, November 16, 2009
The dark side
Alternate movie title: The Moon is New
via flickr.com
The thing that seems to be missing from the advertising blitz for the film coming out this week is a depiction of the celestial body of the title, which as all skywatchers know would be one off of which the sun's rays fail to reflect. This is the closest I could find.I am looking forward to analogous images for Eclipse and especially Breaking Dawn.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Hoss-fightin' hosses and such
Role-playing game handle: Horse de combat
via flickr.com
While the illegal sports of dogfighting and cockfighting are better known, the blood sport of horsefighting is also practiced in some parts of the Far East, despite a fair amount of outcry.
Combat by proxy is not limited to vertebrate species. There are enthusiasts of fighting crickets in China
Perhaps one could redirect this interest to virtual depictions of blood sports in the context of video games, so that actual animals would not suffer. There is already a series of Alien vs. Predator games which one could consider to be a variation on this idea, albeit one that is a little easier to market.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Waiting to levitate
Reality program: Hellholes, where contestants on a rapidly diminishing floor compete to see who can be the last one left alive while performing mental and physical challenges
via flickr.com
When people say that something "fell between the cracks" my mind rebels. Surely if a floor were cracked in certain places, the best place for something to fall would be in between the cracks, because that way the thing would not fall into a crack itself. One could say something "fell into a crack" or "fell into a space between the parts which are between the cracks."
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
Fun with literal-minded electronica
Song title: (1) Jammed Shredder, (2) Androids Go Diving
Suggested partway through listening to the eleventh track on this album, which was a Magnatune freebie a month back.
Sunday, November 01, 2009
Autumn in upstate New York
Dissertation title: She Was Like a British Romantic: Parallels between the substance inspired writing of Jack Bruce and of Thomas de Quincey
Not Bruce and Eric Clapton and Ginger Baker there on the small stage entertaining the Columbus Day weekend crowd, but an amazing simulacrum. My apologies for the shakiness of the hand held shot, as my cheap digital camera does not have anything resembling image stabilization.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Cruel bars of gourd
Domain name: punkinheadjack.com
It's quite dark out already but I'm not seeing any trick-or-treat action on our very quiet, rather safe suburban street. So I don't think Jack is in that much danger of violent liberation, out on the porch rail where he is now.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Frightful! Also, there might be a monster
Book name: Neptune's Illegitimate Daughter
LESLIE HOLMES
via britishpathe.com
Friday music! of a rather peculiar sort!
Perhaps science and technology has progressed to the point that we can settle the controversy about Loch Ness by simply creating an aquatic beast of our own and introducing it to the famous locale. We'll put whoever's responsible for this varmint in charge: 
I doubt that it can be much more disruptive to the ecology than the monster-hunting robots and other seekers already clogging up the loch looking for a (presumably rather annoyed) natural sea creature.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
We'd be afraid not to give him an award
Band name: Glenduff Mobile Psyops Brigade
Despite the impressiveness of the armament, I think the best part is how he made the backpack with the "jet ports" out of a broken typewriter.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Rembrandt's got nothing on me today
Thoroughbred name: Non-Specular Bid
(Because of this horse)
I was at work the other day in a room with a little-used whiteboard turned to the wall and saw myself in something approaching the ultimate in soft-focus. Perhaps mirrors with the exact right degree of bumpiness could be made, scientifically, in which one sees what others see of oneself when they are completely besotted with tender emotion. Or is puppy (horsey?) love still in style?
I was at work the other day in a room with a little-used whiteboard turned to the wall and saw myself in something approaching the ultimate in soft-focus. Perhaps mirrors with the exact right degree of bumpiness could be made, scientifically, in which one sees what others see of oneself when they are completely besotted with tender emotion. Or is puppy (horsey?) love still in style?
Monday, October 26, 2009
A mania anticipated
Media sensation: Balloon Mobs
Inspired by the hoaxers, a great many lonely Americans construct and take off in color-coded personal helium balloons (presumably wearing breathing apparatus), in search of love and community in the upper troposphere. In the process, beautiful aerial displays drift over the eastern slops of the Rockies, with a few soaring to icy dizzying heights, and a few others falling like overripe fruit down to the unforgiving Earth. Experts speculate on how the phenomenon has grown out of the increasing levels of isolation and narcissism in society coupled with worries over the H1N1 pandemic.
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